You are going to experience some confusion when it comes to romance in this period, Libra, and you will use this time to find clarity in this area, whether you are single or attached. It’s a good time to reestablish the difference between fantasy and reality, as the line between them can get a little fuzzy. Chemical solutions will not serve you very well right now and are more likely to exacerbate problems rather than solve them. It’s time to clear out the cobwebs of your mind and let in some fresh air. This may mean a break from habits or routine in your love affairs, but you will be able to negotiate these changes quite nicely without burning any bridges in romance today.
***
The above is my daily love horoscope from Facebook… I know that it’s kinda lame, but sometimes it can be spot on. I always check it after my day at school and it’s usually right. SO right in fact, that it’s scary…
You are going to experience some confusion when it comes to romance in this period, Libra, and you will use this time to find clarity in this area, whether you are single or attached.
The above is so true.. I came to school today confused as to whether my feelings for him were still there or not, or were they just a fiction of my imagination. In the beginning, when I just arrived in school, I told Ivy and Amir that I didn’t have feelings for him anymore, but I actually do. Or I thought I did… Anyway, Ivy was happy that I had finally cleared my system of what is Ujin and Amir began by protesting that Ujin was a nice guy and that there was nothing wrong with liking him. I joined in his protest, which totally went against the statement that I didn’t like him anymore, which made me even more confused as to what my feelings were.
Throughout that morning before MDM class, I was waiting and hoping that somehow he would appear and give me his usual pat on the head. Like he usually does. I miss those. But the morning went by without me seeing him, or rather I chose not to look around to locate him. So I went to MDM class somewhat disappointed.
It’s a good time to reestablish the difference between fantasy and reality, as the line between them can get a little fuzzy.
I think this was referring to my hasty conclusions about his feelings towards me. I misinterpreted his actions towards me. I can’t say I’m not disappointed, but I am.
I only saw him in MDM class and he didn’t even look at me, or maybe he did but I didn’t notice cause I didn’t want to look at him. Honestly, my heart was beating really fast when he walked into the room. You know the type of heartbeat you get when you’re watching a suspense scene where you know that a ghost or killer is going to pounce out at any moment? Yeah, those scenes. I was wondering why though, why didn’t I want to look at him? Was I afraid that I’d start swooning over him again?
Anyhow, I did look at him. Finally. And I just went, ‘Cool… This isn’t so bad…‘ until the words of my brother came flooding back to me.
He said:
I used to be very popular with the girls, and I even once got scolded by them on the phone. In fact, I always got scolded on the phone. You know why?
There was this girl in my school who never smiled. And me being me, I tried to be nice. So I walked up to her and told her that she looked pretty that day or say that her hair looks nice or something, just to make her smile a bit. But I didn’t like her.
Soon, she confessed to me but I rejected her. She then started scolding me and asking me why if I didn’t like her, was I so nice to her?
I just answered “Cause I’m a nice guy…”
He then proceeded to look at me and said:
This is what your Mr. Buffy is doing to you… So you’d better be careful…
I was mortified when he told me this. Does this mean that he never liked me at all? But I’ve never once acted emo with my friends, I’ve always been hyper and all happy and giggly! There’s no reason for him to just randomly start patting me on the head right?
This was the question that made it clear for me.
I’m not girlfriend material. At ALL! I’m just the girl that everyone is friendly with but nobody likes cause I’m fat and not like all the other girls. Out of all my friends I think that I’m the least attractive… The nicest comment that I’ve ever heard from anyone is “You’re so cute!” and that’s getting really, really old… Why on earth would he go for me? He’s better of with some bimbo…
Plus, this afternoon during break, Ivy was being all emo cause she thinks that she’s fat and they were talking about how hot Megan Fox was and how she wanted to be like Megan Fox. During this time, he was sitting right next to me by the way. He just came over and sat there! Right next to me! WTF…. I can’t say I was not happy… I was… I think…
Anyway, Ivy asked him.
Ivy: Do you go for pretty girls or hot girls?
Ujin: -looks up from computer- Pretty girls…
I was reading my text book during this time and narrowed my eyes. I’m neither of those. I remembered the other short haired girl who likes him, she’s pretty…
It’s time to clear out the cobwebs of your mind and let in some fresh air.
This is so what I’m going to do today. I’m going to empty my brain of all this nonsense and just start anew. Like when I just met him, before all these feelings towards him manifested. I’m pretty sure that he likes that other girl. She’s prettier and they both look closer. I bet she has his number and his MSN… Unlike me…The lame-o who never had the guts to ask…
***
He patted me on the head today. It was a little later than usual but he did pat me on the head. It was after break when we were going to head off to Mr. Tan’s class. I looked at him and he looked at me and he patted my head. It’s comforting to know that even if he doesn’t like me, I can still look forward to his pats everyday.
I still stare at him or steal glances at him whenever I can. I guess that means I still have feelings for him, but they’re not as strong as they used to be. Thanks to my brother’s logic and his actions…
I’m still confused though…
But now, I think I can live without knowing how he feels about me.
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